"Where have I been?", you might ask. Well, it's not as if I haven't been around. But I've just been busy doing other things for a long time. My life has totally changed since the last time I wrote something here. Dating a different woman, just moved out of the old apartment into a back room of my office.

Continue reading "Back in the Saddle: Thoughts on Moving"

Had a strange day yesterday. It was Valentine's Day. I was feeling kind of moody. Been under a lot of financial pressure this month. Which has been affecting everything. The filing of my divorce papers is effectively on hold until I receive another check to pay for the filing fee. That's pretty agonizing since both my ex and I want to move on. Had dinner with my Valentine last night which was good, except that she too was feeling strange. The current political state in the U.S. is really upsetting her. She is so worried that the U.S. will become a facist state that she seems to be verging on depression. We've been talking about possibly moving to Canada to be out of the U.S. if and when other countries attack it in a WWIII scenario. I asked her "what hopes she had for our relationship?". She replied that she had none. All her hopes were for her two daugheters--having none for herself. I told her I thought that was sad. We sat in silence for a while. Then she said that in so many words that she had lost faith in relationships and learned to not have expectations. Of course, all this is said to give you an idea of my general mood before going to sleep.

Continue reading "Relationship Fears: Glass Shelves Crashing to the Floor Signal Perspective Shift"

This is the first of two dreams from last night. It takes place in New York City, where I lived during the mid to late '80s into the early '90's...

I am walking along a crowded sidewalk on a city street. My soon-to-be ex-wife Kerry walks by me going in the opposite direction. She is wearing a fitted white dress—kind of a business suit. The dress glows in comparison to the dreary dark gray color of everthing else. I watch her walk away for a bit and notice that she is walking with an exaggerated sway of her hips. She is thinner and younger looking than she is now.

Continue reading "Ex-Wife in a White Dress, Racquetball"

Went on a bit of a hiatus for a while. Was mulling over whether I really wanted to log in every day or so and write in my dreams. I have to work at remembering them, which takes a bit of time while lying their in bed in the dark to fix them in my conscious memory--before dozing back off. But, here I am, back again finally with another doozey of a dream. Had some other dreams, too, since my last post, which I'll add and backdate.



Continue reading "Insecure on a Windy Cliff"

Earlier today, I got an email from my girlfriend who is pretty active politically, saying that she was frustrated by the self indulgent attitudes of lots of Americans regarding life. She was feeling pretty depressed about it and during the day I heard John Lennon's anti-war song "Imagine" on the car radio—he died on December 8th, 1980.

Continue reading "John Lennon Remembered"

Just a shorty today... Don't quite know what to make of this one, but here is what I can remember:

I'm in some kind of concrete multi-level parking structure. There's a skinny guy with me, kind of like the character called "mouse" in the first Matrix movie. There's some kind of a fuse burning on the ground putting out a bright light and sparks.

Continue reading "Pyrotechnics in the Parking Structure"

Okay, well, yesterday was pretty stressful, worrying about my relationship with the special woman I'm seeing. We each have things in our indivdual lives that we need to be attending to, so we're intentionally spending the beginning of each week apart.
Continue reading "Jet Plane: Life Path Waiting For Takeoff"