Relationship Fears: Glass Shelves Crashing to the Floor Signal Perspective Shift
Wednesday, February 15. 2006
Had a strange day yesterday. It was Valentine's Day. I was feeling kind of moody. Been under a lot of financial pressure this month. Which has been affecting everything. The filing of my divorce papers is effectively on hold until I receive another check to pay for the filing fee. That's pretty agonizing since both my ex and I want to move on. Had dinner with my Valentine last night which was good, except that she too was feeling strange. The current political state in the U.S. is really upsetting her. She is so worried that the U.S. will become a facist state that she seems to be verging on depression. We've been talking about possibly moving to Canada to be out of the U.S. if and when other countries attack it in a WWIII scenario. I asked her "what hopes she had for our relationship?". She replied that she had none. All her hopes were for her two daugheters--having none for herself. I told her I thought that was sad. We sat in silence for a while. Then she said that in so many words that she had lost faith in relationships and learned to not have expectations. Of course, all this is said to give you an idea of my general mood before going to sleep.
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